Yes, yes. I am using the reference from the movie "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days"....
However, while the main character in the movie, Andie, discovers how to lose a guy (acting obnoxiously) for the sake of a good magazine cover story, I am not suggesting that we all try to learn how to lose hope by doing a whole list of strategies; I am quite confident that most of us have all experienced the feeling of hopelessness all on our own, without trying. And, might I add, we don't want to be hopeless. I am prone to quickly lose site of hope when I grab hold of something else, namely, self-reliance.
I could go on and on and create a book of a blogpost, but I'll try to be concise here.
When we see something we want, the world says we can have it if you only try hard enough. There are rows and racks of self-help books with subjects of all different colors and flavors. There are bajillions of blogposts out there with people's advice, recommendations and experiences with "the best way to" [ fill in the blank].
We call our families, our significant others, or friends when we are struggling with something, hoping they will offer some sort of affirmation that we are doing ok, or ask them advice on how to do ok. Fact is, we get tired. Very tired. See, the self-reliance circle is brutal and it brings you back to yourself again and again, and let's face it; You are not perfect. You are not always strong. You are not always able. You are not always motivated. You are not always right. The worst part is, we get mad at ourselves or at our loved ones for not being perfect. For not....
being God.
No one can be God. We can make ourselves into a god, but we will never be good ones. I know for a fact I'd make a lousy God. When I try to rely on myself though, I am not letting God be God. I'm trying to be his right hand, not live by the power of it.
Here is the nasty circular trip self-reliance can take us on, essentially, how we lose hope:
We set out to do things on our own strength and ability...self reliance.
When we do well, we get prideful of ourselves and our outcomes.
Eventually we fail at something or fall short and then we hold onto our
pride even more tightly. Heaven forbid we be wrong.
In our pride, we become subject to fear. We don't want to lose
what has become so important to us.
Important to us: Our acheivement has become our
identity and our idol, thus the fear of loss.
We try so hard to do what we want to do or to be who we want to
be that we become desperate.
If we are unsuccessful in our efforts and fear is the driving force, then
we start to self-sabotage ourselves. Try to make something that we
feel is inevitable (hopelessness) happen so at least we can find some
measure of comfort that we are prepared for disappointment.
Self-sabotage is a brand of control/manipulation which is just another form of
SELF RELIANCE
Here is the truth:
We find freedom when we come to the end of ourselves and realize that God never meant for us to do anything on our own strength. But he gives us the power to do everything in him who gives us strength.
(phil. 4:13)
So, as painful as trying to go the self-reliance route is, it does bring us to the end of ourselves and it is there that we have a choice. We can choose to keep ourselves driving the circular rut deeper and deeper until we lose all hope, OR, we can choose to let God be our hope.
He gives us strength in our weakness.
He gives us wisdom when we have none
He gives us rest when we are weary
He gives us grace when we deserve none
He delights in us when no one else does
He gives us all of our needs, in fact He knows all of them before we do
He gives us joy when we are in the mundane
He gives us himself when we have no one
He gives us justice when we are trodden by injustice
He gives us hope in a world that is hopeless...
It's ok to find yourself broken. Hurting. Lost. Completely at the end of yourself. Just don't try to fix yourself by obeying every rule in the "self help bible." It is sure to let you down.
Follow and give yourself to something so much greater. Fix your eye on Jesus. He is the one who was perfect, yet with joy, gave himself for us, and now we can be holy and righteous in God's eyes. Because of Jesus.
So,
"let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood." -Hebrews 12:1-4
And, so as to keep with the theme of the movie referenced in my blogpost title: Ladies, do not "frost yourself."
Don't dress yourself up with the pretense of being something you will only always wish to be: perfect. Let God, who is perfection, be your source and when you submit yourself to him, you will see your hope.
God is eternal, Jesus is God, Jesus is hope, Hope is eternal.
However, while the main character in the movie, Andie, discovers how to lose a guy (acting obnoxiously) for the sake of a good magazine cover story, I am not suggesting that we all try to learn how to lose hope by doing a whole list of strategies; I am quite confident that most of us have all experienced the feeling of hopelessness all on our own, without trying. And, might I add, we don't want to be hopeless. I am prone to quickly lose site of hope when I grab hold of something else, namely, self-reliance.
I could go on and on and create a book of a blogpost, but I'll try to be concise here.
When we see something we want, the world says we can have it if you only try hard enough. There are rows and racks of self-help books with subjects of all different colors and flavors. There are bajillions of blogposts out there with people's advice, recommendations and experiences with "the best way to" [ fill in the blank].
We call our families, our significant others, or friends when we are struggling with something, hoping they will offer some sort of affirmation that we are doing ok, or ask them advice on how to do ok. Fact is, we get tired. Very tired. See, the self-reliance circle is brutal and it brings you back to yourself again and again, and let's face it; You are not perfect. You are not always strong. You are not always able. You are not always motivated. You are not always right. The worst part is, we get mad at ourselves or at our loved ones for not being perfect. For not....
being God.
No one can be God. We can make ourselves into a god, but we will never be good ones. I know for a fact I'd make a lousy God. When I try to rely on myself though, I am not letting God be God. I'm trying to be his right hand, not live by the power of it.
Here is the nasty circular trip self-reliance can take us on, essentially, how we lose hope:
We set out to do things on our own strength and ability...self reliance.
When we do well, we get prideful of ourselves and our outcomes.
Eventually we fail at something or fall short and then we hold onto our
pride even more tightly. Heaven forbid we be wrong.
In our pride, we become subject to fear. We don't want to lose
what has become so important to us.
Important to us: Our acheivement has become our
identity and our idol, thus the fear of loss.
We try so hard to do what we want to do or to be who we want to
be that we become desperate.
If we are unsuccessful in our efforts and fear is the driving force, then
we start to self-sabotage ourselves. Try to make something that we
feel is inevitable (hopelessness) happen so at least we can find some
measure of comfort that we are prepared for disappointment.
Self-sabotage is a brand of control/manipulation which is just another form of
SELF RELIANCE
Here is the truth:
We find freedom when we come to the end of ourselves and realize that God never meant for us to do anything on our own strength. But he gives us the power to do everything in him who gives us strength.
(phil. 4:13)
So, as painful as trying to go the self-reliance route is, it does bring us to the end of ourselves and it is there that we have a choice. We can choose to keep ourselves driving the circular rut deeper and deeper until we lose all hope, OR, we can choose to let God be our hope.
He gives us strength in our weakness.
He gives us wisdom when we have none
He gives us rest when we are weary
He gives us grace when we deserve none
He delights in us when no one else does
He gives us all of our needs, in fact He knows all of them before we do
He gives us joy when we are in the mundane
He gives us himself when we have no one
He gives us justice when we are trodden by injustice
He gives us hope in a world that is hopeless...
It's ok to find yourself broken. Hurting. Lost. Completely at the end of yourself. Just don't try to fix yourself by obeying every rule in the "self help bible." It is sure to let you down.
Follow and give yourself to something so much greater. Fix your eye on Jesus. He is the one who was perfect, yet with joy, gave himself for us, and now we can be holy and righteous in God's eyes. Because of Jesus.
So,
"let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood." -Hebrews 12:1-4
And, so as to keep with the theme of the movie referenced in my blogpost title: Ladies, do not "frost yourself."
Don't dress yourself up with the pretense of being something you will only always wish to be: perfect. Let God, who is perfection, be your source and when you submit yourself to him, you will see your hope.
God is eternal, Jesus is God, Jesus is hope, Hope is eternal.
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