Mommies, Plow your field. This title came to me when talking to my husband (via text message which you can see a blip of below) about how I just don't feel cut out to be a mom. More days than not I feel exhausted, overwhelmed, clueless and inadequate. "Well," Joshua said, "that just means there is more room for grace!" More room for grace. Yes. Today I was tempted to melt down in a puddle of tears because I just felt stuck in a place of "I can't do this anymore, but I have to...they need me." I worked my butt off yesterday just being a mom and then all it seems that I got from it was the *occasional* tantrum, demand for more of me than I felt that I had to give, and a way too late bedtime. Then, as I fought all day for patience, I slip up at the end of the day and express frustration and impatience in my tone to my littles leaving me to go to bed fighting guilt on top of all the other battles. Grace. I need to remember grace. Grace to receive and grace to give. Grace to keep plowing.
Hosea 10:12 "Sow for yourselves righteousness; reap steadfast love; break up your fallow (unplowed) ground; for it is time to seek the Lord, that he may come and rain righteousness on you."
The Lord has gifted me with these precious children. Yes, they are hard work. Tears. Sweat. Blood. Each day can be a battle to walk into, often time with inadequate armor. (By inadequate I mean not enough bibs to protect from projectile rice cereal flung from the spoon you are attempting to hold onto but your baby grabs it and catapults the cereal directly onto your shirt, or not enough YOU to feed your baby while simultaneously dealing with your son's watermelon drippage down his clean shirt, into his high chair and onto the floor). But...as hard and messy as being a mom can be, we have unplowed fields here, ladies. We have souls that are ready to have the seeds of the love and truth of Christ poured into them. We have a responsibility that is ginormous but we have grace. We have the LORD who is longing to be gracious to us (Isaiah 30:18) and when we seek to be obedient, to lean on the Lord for help and give our children HIM, he comes and RAINS RIGHTEOUSNESS on us! I will let scripture speak for itself and post a few more truths/promises/encouragements to hold onto:
Hebrews 12:11: "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace by those who have been trained by it."
Proverbs 10:28: "The hope of the righteous brings joy..."
Nehemiah 8:10: "...for the joy of the Lord is your strength."
SO, as my husband says in these text messages below, PLOW YOUR FIELD!
Thank you, hubby for your wisdom and for inspiration for this short, likely discombobulated but heartfelt blogpost. :) Now, as I get ready to wrap this post up, I'll leave some pictures that capture some of the moments that make all my sleepless nights and -0 alone time seem totally worth it. Well...almost. ;)
Israel took a "solfie" on my phone. Seriously? Lord, I pray I would not foster a little narcissist by owning and sharing my i-phone with my toddler.
Something funny to look at when Joshua and I really want a laugh in the midst of exhaustion:
Remember that watermelon mess I mentioned above? Well, the little helper was amazing at helping me clean it and then some up with this handy dandy mop:
Another heart melter....he had to keep his hat on all day just like daddy.
My favorite person... on the third floor. Haha...He's my one and only third floor.